Anyone else struggle with their identity? Someone's words or behavior can literally change the trajectory of your day or week? You find yourself replaying it over and over again and sort of spiral down this rabbit hole of "not enough" or "I should have..." or "I will never be..."
Yeah, me too.
But my goal this year is value a healthy fear of the Lord OVER fear of Man.
I want to grow so much in my security in HIM that people's thoughts and actions cannot affect me the way they have in the past. I want to believe the TRUTH that He made me uniquely and wonderfully and how my emotions are beautiful. I want to be fully myself and fully alive and present and not hold back worried about if its "too much" or if someone will leave or betray me.
Nope. I am not going to worry about that. I want to live life in FULL COLOR not safe and in black and white.
So I see you 2019. I am coming for you - heart open, feet firm, and head lifted high. This is the year I am going to live in SECURITY. Who I am am and WHOSE I am.
Friday, January 11, 2019
Monday, December 24, 2018
Sunday, August 19, 2018
It was just yesterday that we found out you were a BABY GIRL! We shot an artsy video in France while Aunt Kiki was in town and played it via Skype for all the grandparents as our big GENDER REVEAL!
We JUST took your baby passport pictures and walked through St. Emillion like rookie parents with a stroller on a cobblestone street.
It was just yesterday that we moved across the WORLD with a 12 week old on an 11 hour international flight back to Texas. (You slept the entire time!)
It was just yesterday that we drove 2 hours per day in a borrowed car to take Daddy to and from work because we had sold our cars before France and had nowhere to live and no money to buy a new car.
I still remember taking you to Square 1 at Watermark and meeting a ton of Mommas who actually live in Richardson and many are starting kinder with you this year!
We moved to Lakewood in a tiny duplex that didn't have a BATH TUB so your whole first year you had to shower with me or your Daddy. You still prefer showers to baths. :)
I still remember taking you to Baby Bounce at Northpark and it was an EPIC FAIL. All these moms with well behaved children while you ran around in and out of the babies with your scarves over your head and wouldn't listen to one thing the music teacher was asking you to do. We never went back!
Then we had your first day at Mother's Day Out. We would drive and get matching smoothies at Smoothie King or split a muffin at Starbucks and then I would drop you off, work as hard and as fast as I could and come back to pick you up. You loved school from DAY 1.
You are also super flexible as we have moved 7 times in your 5 years of life so far. When we lived in Lakewood you had this AMAZINGLY bright and cheerful bright turquoise room. It was my favorite place in the world.
I still remember your 1st Halloween and your cute ladybug costume and how you charmed all the neighbors with how cute you were. Then we had your "ladybug" themed first birthday party in honor of your nickname Stella-bug :)
FAST FORWARD TO this week when I took you to get your nails painted and have your first proper tea party and Daddy took you to play your first round of Putt Putt and you loved it, despite the 99 degree heat. It is a week of FIRSTS....
I am not sure how we got here, but tomorrow we send you off to your FIRST DAY of Kindergarten. Each year you have grown, changed, made new friends, and become more and more your own little person. You are ready. You are going to be a light. We are SO proud of you. We know this is the right school and you got the perfect teacher. We are praying for her and for sweet, lifelong friends during these elementary school years.