To Our Angel Baby

This week marks your due date.... A milestone we will never reach with you.  We are grateful to have your healthy little sister growing bigger every day, but we have not forgotten the hole that you left in our hearts in February.  As I have watched the other Moms due in October grow and blossom, I can't help but wonder what you would have been like.  A darling little boy or a sweet baby girl, just like our Stella.   I do know that Stella has 1 (or 2) siblings up in Heaven keeping my grandparents company until I get to hold you on the other side. There is HOPE. 

As your due date approaches and the other moms give birth to little perfect October beauties, I want to take a moment to say we have not forgotten you.  My heart still aches for the unknown, the unexplored, the mystery and unanswered prayers that we still don't understand.  We are forever your parents and biggest fans and I know that you are in good hands with your Perfect Creator and Heavenly Father.  We will raise your little sister in a way that she will know about you (when the time is right) and how sad we were that we never got to hold you.  You have already had a permanent impact on us, our extended family, and others around the world. You have strengthened me and your Daddy's marriage, taught us all about praying BOLD prayers, The Creator, and the miracle of pregnancy and creating a new life - something we will never take for granted. 

You changed us all for the better... we will never be the same. 

You are loved. You are cherished. You are forever in our hearts and minds. A painful memory at times, but something to look forward to someday. We will have eternity to hold you, know you, and love you.  I miss you. 

All my love,

Mommy

*Below are a few pages of the art journal I made following the loss. It was my biggest coping mechanism and helped me beyond words. I needed a place to PUT things: verses, letters, sonograms, cards, pictures, etc. This was my "place."